I’ve just had a great mentoring session with a young person at Macdonalds! Although I’ve met and spoken to her before, it was great to have that one-to-one time with her. It’s amazing how much you can learn about someone in an hour. It’s got me really excited, as I can see the amazing potential she has and the person she could grow to be.
I would love to spend a good hour with each of the young people I have oversight of, getting to know them, and getting excited about them as a person – but with over 50 young people to meet, it could take me a while! My second thought, was could I phone them all, but thats not as powerful as meeting face to face, and imagine the phone bill!
Of course this is where team comes in. There is no way I can give 50 young people the same amount of attention. We don’t really have a structure that ensures each young person has a good relationship with a leader, but there are opportunities for it. Some will just get to know leaders through a weekly meeting, some will get to know them better through small groups, and an even smaller number will be mentored by a leader.
How do we build relationships with young people? Yes, it happens naturally through just talking and sharing together, but the smaller the group of young people you are relating to, the closer you can get to them – true?
I think the following things are all good ways of building relationships – small groups, mentoring, residentials – but that’s not their main purpose.
I guess the question I need to answer is – how are we currently building relationships with young people, and can we be more pro-active in doing so?
I’ll come back with my answer another day!
mentoring October 28, 2005
yesterday, today, and tomorrow! October 26, 2005
Yesterday was a great day off. Hubby and I got a full ten hours sleep and woke late feeling rather rested! After a bacon sarnie for breakfast, and finishing our bible study on Job we went off to see Wallace and Gromit- The Curse of the Were-Rabbit! It is absolutely excellent, and I’m sure the video will make a contender for our anniversary present next year. After an early evening nap, I got up to make pizza – the yummiest meal we make I think!
Today has been a bit of a downer – the wi-fi has been down, someone I was meant to meet didn’t turn up, and I’ve been low on ideas and inspiration for Sunday. House group had better have jaffa cakes tonight!!
Tomorrow is a planned quiet day, and after today I feel its just what I need. Time to re-connect with God and take a walk in my beloved Nonsuch Park! Nonsuch Park is where Henry VIII’s Nonsuch palace was (named because there was non-such like it!). It is a mere three minute walk from my parent’s home (situated on Henry’s hunting ground.) I cycled through the park every day when I went to high school, and it is a beautiful park. Both my primary school and high school were named after it, and so I guess Nonsuch will always be a part of me.
I reckon this must be the optimum time to go, with all the different colours of the leaves on the trees. I’m really looking forward to it.
I’ll then have lunch with my parents who are on half term, before coming home to cook! We’ve two people over for dinner tomorrow, and I’m really looking forward to the chocolate dessert I’m planning on making!
thinking, and not finding (many) solutions! October 22, 2005
I’ve had a really good meeting with my 11-14s outreach group leaders this morning. We’ve discussed what the vision for the group is, discipline and behaviour, and there have been lots of ideas and enthusiasm, and some but not many solutions. (You can’t solve the world’s or a youth group’s problems in one morning!)
Just to add to my thinking, I’ve just read Sarah’s post on ‘effective work with teenage boys’.
Youth work can be so challenging at times, not just coping with young people, but actually considering why we do what we do, what we want groups to look like, differences between female and male leaders etc.
I am really grateful for the teams God has given me. They are made up of different people. Some can handle the difficult boys really well, and build relationships with them. Some are good with the girls who just want to chat. Together they have a wide range of talents and skills, and they make a great team, serving the young people God has given us. I am privileged to lead such a great team. We may not have all the answers, but together we serve our Almighty God who does!
year out or jnc student? October 20, 2005
I’ve been thinking through the options of employing a student.
Basically, the church want to provide me with a helper starting from September next year. This decision was made before I arrived. I think the main reason behind this is because my remit is 11-18s and the previous youth worker’s was 14-18s, so therefore my work load must be more than his was. I will ask my line manager in my next meeting, though he did say I could write the job description and all that.
But at the moment, it is hard for me to envisage what this helper would do. I’m not even two months into this job yet. My thoughts so far are that if they took some of my work, I could spend more time investing in the leaders. But what work I would hand over I don’t know.
So if I don’t know what I want them to do, deciding whether it should be a year out student or someone studying for a JNC is difficult. The options seem so vast and as I don’t know what I want it makes narrowing them down rather difficult.
I still think the first step is to write a job description, but perhaps to help myself do that I should write down what I do currently and how many hours I spend doing what. I’m not really into a regular pattern of work yet – this isn’t easy!
growing leaders October 16, 2005
As a staff team, we’re reading the book Growing Leaders by James Lawrence. The chapter we’re discussing tomorrow is all about how as leaders our relationship with God is important, and how it is hard to separate it from our work. We are called to grow in our relationship with God, to grow as disciples, and so how do we do this?
It’s so easy to feel as if we’ve reached a plateau. Growing and changing is hard work. Two points stick in my mind from reading the chapter yesterday.
1. Obey Jesus’ commands. After teaching pathfinders about the 10 commandments this morning, reading Growing Leaders, and my bible reading this morning on God’s law, I’m beginning to see a theme! Do I obey God’s commands? What are God’s commands apart from the usual ten? Do I take God’s commands seriously? If I’m honest – no, not really. Thinking about it all last night, I really wanted to repent of this bad attitude, but didn’t as I knew nothing would change as I got up this morning. I did pour out my heart to God, and say sorry for not taking his commands seriously, but didn’t feel I could ask for forgiveness, knowing I wasn’t going to change. But I do want to change, and I do want to grow, and perhaps after more reflecting this morning, I now feel I can truly repent and receive God’s forgiveness. But I need to take action – a study of what God’s commands are would be a good place to start, but then how do I start obeying them? How do I deal with the knowledge that I will always fail at obeying them all? I’m all too aware that these good intentions often end up coming to nothing, however determined I am. Ummmmm. I will try though, after all that is all God can ask of me surely – to do my best.
2. Spiritual disciplines. The chapter also talked about how the majority of christian leaders don’t practise many of the spiritual disciplines. It refered to Richard Foster’s book Celebration of Discipline, and John Ortberg’s book (the title of which I can’t remember). I haven’t stopped to consider how many disciplines I practice, mainly because I know I’m not good at discipline, and I have mainly been thinking about commandments! But I resonated with this part of the chapter because I do want to grow in my relationship with God and I see these disciplines (especially bible study and prayer) as important and I know I’m not good at them. The temptation is to buy John Ortberg’s book (I’ve already got and read Richard’s), read it and then probably forget about it. Its all too easy to read and gain information about stuff and then not put it into practice. That’s what I’m so good at doing – reading, and not doing! Why is it so hard? Growing leaders challenged this too, suggesting accountability as a possible answer. Can accountability really help growth? I guess it can help some, but in the end, the hard work, the change has to come from you yourself. I’ve got some changing to do – but then haven’t we all!
massive baking session October 16, 2005
Last night, I decided some baking was needed (we were out of cake.) So I got the recipie books out, and found three cakes I had the ingredients for. Not being able to decide on one, I made all three! So I now have one batch of gingerbread men, one batch of chocolate chip cookies and one batch of rock cakes in my kitchen! At least one batch will have to go to youth group tonight, or we’ll never eat them all!
I also managed to complete all my ironing in between baking and washing up!
brain hurts October 13, 2005
I’ve just spent far too many hours reading about the history of the bible, archaeology and all that! All to produce a two page document to provide a summary for my volunteer youthworkers (and any young people who decide they want to know more!) So, looking for some light relief, I found Sarah and Kathryn’s new blog for women in youth ministry. Looks great, and I’ll be returning to use my brain when reading it another time!
Have managed to put two REM albums onto the ipod so far. Hubby wasn’t happy that I was sat in bed with it on last night! But, hey, its a new toy, and I’ll grow tired of it soon. In fact I haven’t even touched it today.
Off to IKEA soon. It’s only 10mins drive away, and so this will be our third visit in a month!!! All we need to get is a few lampshades, and then the house is complete (until I want to start decorating!) We’re also giving a friend a lift who needs to buy curtains.
But before then, I should probably start thinking about risk assessments!! All these fun things we need to ensure are done as youth ministers!
fabulous day! October 7, 2005
Not only have I won an ipod today, but I have also found a nice pair of trousers that fit me in the sale!!!! (after a miserable days shopping on Saturday, todays find has made me very happy!)
I also bought a top for £4, and I’ve sold another of my old physics text books on amazon! I hope youth group tonight continues in the same way!
Shame I’ve still got all the washing up to do from last nights dinner party!
i just won an ipod! October 7, 2005
I am in a very good mood this morning after reading my email. I completed the youthwork the partnership online survey ages ago, and this morning I received an email saying I had been picked as the winner of the ipod!!!
I don’t often win things, so this has made my day!
random stuff October 6, 2005
I’ve just taught myself to make an origami frog for youth group on friday. It doesn’t look much like a frog in my opinion, but it jumps! (supposedly).
I am really short of ideas to blog about at the moment, hence the frog comment!
I want to welcome Duncan into the world, who was born on Oct 4th. He’s the son of my very good friend with whom I grew up with.
I’m off to lunch soon with someone from the church, I haven’t a clue who she is, hubby accepted the lunch date on my behalf! We’re also hosting a dinner party tonight for some people hubby met after church on Sunday. I’m going to try making herby bread, to go alongside my standard pasta and sauce. Lots of getting to know people – all good stuff going on!
