Decorating nearly complete! December 31, 2004

Yes, the past few days have been devoted to decorating our dining room. We’ll do the last coat of paint later today (on the walls at least!). Tommorow will see the woodwork painted and the light fitting fitted! Then we just have to wait a fortnight for the carpet to arrive, go and buy a new dining table and all will be complete! Well, almost.

You see, we were going to bring my parents piano up from London, but over Christmas, we tried to get it out of the room it is currently in. We failed. When the piano was first put in there, the two downstairs rooms were joined, knocked through, open plan (whatever you want to call it). As I got older and played the piano more, and everyone else wanted to watch TV, we needed to separate the rooms to keep the noise separate, so the wall was built between the two. Now we can’t get the piano out!!!! It looks like we’re going to have to buy a new piano.

Anyway, apart from decorating, not a lot else has happened. We’re doing the usual kind of stuff, cleaning, eating, exercising, shopping – nothing exciting. I’m also practising a new trick for the new members night at Leicester Magic Circle. Not an illusion this time, a kids trick really. I’ll let you know how it goes.

Nice to be home December 28, 2004

Hubby and I enjoyed our time at home. We spent time with old friends and family, and Christmas was celebrated in style too.

It was sad that we attended a funeral of a fellow magician on Christmas eve, but it was definetely the best funeral I have attended (if I can say that!) The church was packed, there was laughter, tears and applause, a true thanksgiving of Pete’s life.

But now we are home again, the Christmas presents we received have been put away, hubby is decorating downstairs as I type this. I’ve been working this morning, and life seems normal again. Its nice to be home again together. Just the two of us, no agenda, no-one to see, just a room to decorate. We’re enjoying the lie-ins, the late nights and the freedom of holidays. And the sun is shining outside. Life is perfect!

busy weekend December 17, 2004

I have a really busy daytoday, and hubby has a really busy weekend, I don’t know whether I’m coming or going!

I had a really good night last night at some friends of ours. It was really good to talk and share some of the stuff I’ve been going through recently. A really nice dinner too!!!!

So today I’m off to the work Christmas lunch, I’ve then got work, followed by youth group tonight.

Tomorrow, Shubby and I are going on a backstage tour of the town hall theatre. Then he has a show to do, and I might have some housework to catch up on!

Sunday includes two magic shows, two church services and hubby and I will be trying to find time to do all the usual things we manage to do on a Sunday!!!

We’ll be having a rest on Monday I think!

Feeding December 16, 2004

We feed our bodies (with food and drink), our brains (with knowledge), our souls (with spiritual stuff), but how much of it is good?

Food – I’m not going to go on about this one, we all know how much junk we eat, and we know what is good and what is bad for us. We just need to be disciplined on this one.

Knowledge – What good does all the learning and thinking we do do? We do need some knowledge, and I guess to improve at things we need to learn more. But often my thinking just gets me more confused. Perhaps I need a teacher, someone to guide me through my thinkings. I can read and read and read, but it doesn’t seem to do me any good. I get more confused, and I don’t use it. The confused knowledge I gain goes to waste. I could do with someone to help me think it and talk it through.

Spiritual stuff – music, art, worship, experience. This is all the stuff we experience. Do all these experiences do us good? I think some can be better than others, though it is hard to categorise. How do you look for the best ones? Experience and feelings only confuse me even more. Do I go by knowledge or experience (which doesn’t always match up to the knowledge.)

So what should we feed ourselves with? And how do we decipher what is bad and what is good for us?

missing something December 15, 2004

I’ve just read an ariticle on http://www.relevantmagazine.com and it really got me thinking.

When I was at university I was part of a group called Angsoc. It was an amazing group of Christians from a wide range of backgrounds. We grew really close over the years and shared a lot. We shared uni stuff, relationship issues, problems, hurts, thoughts. There was always someone there to listen, and not only listen but support. We also shared many different experiences together. We went on retreat together for a weekend each year, talked about our faith, God and we often had different views, making some discussions really challenging. We worshipped together, often in different ways. All in all, we shared our lives together for the three or so years we were at uni together. Today, I’m only in touch with a few of them, but when we do meet up, we can still talk about anything.

But its the closeness, the realness I miss. If I were to describe what church should be like, it would be very similar to my experience of Angsoc. My current experience of church is disappointing. Yes, I enjoy the lively worship, and the enthusiasm of everyone. But I don’t have the closeness, the small groups don’t fully share their lives with each other. I often feel that I should be happy all the time because I’m a Christian and therefore my life should be great. Perhaps I am being unfair a little, I do like the church and I haven’t been there long enough to build close relationships.

Just reading that article today (I think it was called ‘what drew me’ and you’ll find it in the ‘God’ section) made me miss everything I had with Angsoc. Right now, it’s what I long for. Honest, open discussion and exploration for answers.

making money December 14, 2004

I was having a conversation today with a friend, about making money. Without any trouble I came up with three ways for myself to bring in some extra money.

1) I could use my physics degree, and tutor GCSE and A-level students in Physics and maths, perhaps even Chemistry, though I could never manage inorganic chemistry myself!

2) I could teach basic piano. Of course I need a piano for this, but we’re planning to bring my parents one up once the decorating is done.

3) I could complete my tap dance exams to become a qualified teacher. I still have a bit of work to do on this one though!!!!

Of course, I could get a real job, and I may well do that! Or I could sell crafty cards (but so many people are doing this these days). Mmmmm, so many possibilities!

friday night in! December 11, 2004

Last night our church held a Dickens of a Do evening! A christmas party with a muder mystery in the time of Dickens. This meant youth group was cancelled and so I took the opportunity to have a friday night in. Hubby and I used to spend almost every friday night in, watching TV. Of course, he was involved in the Dickens thing and so I was at home alone.

I discovered that Friday night TV has got worse since I was last in, perhaps leading the youth group is a better option. Next week we’re having our Christmas party – should really get on and plan it!!!

I did enjoy just having the chance to sit in front of the TV for the whole evening. And it wasn’t a complete loss, I got to see Little Britain and The Simpsons. And I would have watched a re-run of Cold Feet, if hubby hadn’t come in! I was glad to see him though. I’m not sure I would have lasted an hour of cold feet without falling asleep (it was late). In fact, I fell asleep watching cold feet the night before the night before my wedding! I was excited even then, and needed the TV on to stop me thinking! Unfortunately there wasn’t anything as intersting on the night before my wedding, and I only managed to get 6 hours sleep that night.

Anyway, lunch is in the oven, must go!

purple pig December 10, 2004

When hubby and I were on honeymoon, we went to a place called piggery pottery. We bought a ceramic pig and then painted it! We painted it lilac (the wedding colour scheme), put five white stars on it, painted the date of the wedding on its bottom, and then tied a piece of silver thread round its snout! (also part of the wedding scheme!)

It sits by the tv in our study, next to the computer, hence I’m writing about it now! I suddenly realised that it doesn’t have a name! ‘Our Pig’ doesn’t really do it.

Any ideas?

I passed! December 9, 2004

I’ve just got my bronze medal for tap dancing!

My group (seven from my adult tap class) were the best looking group there – or should I say co-ordinated? We were all in black, and were adorned with silver tinsel! It was so the examiner looked at us and not at our feet!!!!!

But seriously, we’re not that bad, and we all did great. Everyone got their medals, and now we’re talking about doing ballet and jazz classes!

We’ve only got another 6 exams to go and we get a trophy!!!!!

Anyway, this was only supposed to be a short post!

As the group says, One week Burleigh, the next Hollywood!!!!

what shall I do with my life? December 9, 2004

Should I still be asking this question aged 25? After all, I’ve already lived a quarter of a century! But I am still not sure that I am on the right path in life. I have a Physics degree, and as part of that I worked one year for Philips. I enjoyed this, it was just a job, no stress and the people were nice – but would it satisfy me for life- no. That’s why I turned to youthwork. God also had something to do with it, I believe he’s called me to work with young people. To begin with I had a strong desire to teach people about God, to disciple young Christians and help them in their relationships with God. Over the past few years, my heart has turned towards the young people who have no help in life, who are struggling, who are getting excluded from school and those who just have a poor start in life. I have a problem with forcing my faith on these young people, and people who reach out to young people, just to convert them. I’m not into converting people, just helping them. Perhaps this says something about my faith and relationship with God at the moment, I’m not sure. But it is certainly making me question whether I still want to work for the church. I get more and more cynical about ‘the church’ every day. I love God and even though its a struggle at times, I am a Christian and do have a relationship with God, but I find it hard to relate to church.

So what do I do with my life? Do I continue in Christian Youthwork, even if it makes me feel uncomfortable? Do I get into secular youthwork, without the trappings of the church? Or do I change my career altogether, returning to physics or do something else? Do I go for the easy life, or do I do something that I really care about which will cause me lots of stress!!!!????

Questions, questions, questions. The world is full of them!